The third chapter of Other-Song, my serialized novel-in-progress
Very nice. I really liked the back and forth between Lurian and Erol. I found Trendal's storytelling and the adults' evasiveness in answering Lurian's simple question about the Fel'lal wells rather eerie. When the answer finally came, both Lurian and I were beside ourselves. All that to learn they just drank water there.
That story segment reminded me of how certain minority groups can have such mystery and stories built up around them. But the truth was always far more simple and mundane.
I'm still reading your latest instalment with engagement and enjoyment despite my usual aversion to this genre of story so you must be doing something right. My only beef with Chapter 3 is that you've described the pain of Lurian's sprained ankle and the cold wet mud so vividly thatI almost found it too uncomfortable to read - but then I am ridiculously prone to turned ankles and cannot abide being cold and/or wet so for me that bit of this chapter felt like so much "Welcome To My Nightmare", so I wouldn't pay any attention to my strictly personal hangups there. Meanwhile, already wondering what the water will reveal.
Rhyd, I just wanted to tell you that I very much enjoy fantasy and I very much would like to read this. However, I tend to read fantasy in the evening, after all my devices are off, whereas I read substack on laptop, sitting at my desk. I did read the first chapter, but it is just too dissonant for me to continue. So, I'm hoping that your self-motivational tactic can work and hopefully someday soon I can read this book "in the flesh".
The writing for me comes across as vague and indirect as you gradually reveal the world you are building. Not to my taste. I imagine this mystery and lack of quick clarity is deliberate perhaps aiming to bring the reader to a different , not usual perception, but arcane instead.